Oct. 27, 2010 - diet

8:30am eggs with cheese, oatmeal with fruit, coffee (300 cal)
11:00am apple, tortilla (130 cal)
12:30pm three bean salad, salad with balsamic vinaigrette, pb (700 cal)
4:00pm 2 rice cakes, tortilla (100 cal)
5:30pm pasta w broccoli, cupcake (580 cal)
10:00pm twizzlers, goldfish, cupcake (400 cal)

Total calories: 2,210 


Workout
3 mile walk
Legs

Thoughts on today: I went a little overboard today....I am really frustrated with losing weight (or lack therof).  I know 'quitting' won't do me any good, but I'm sick of eating like a saint and not seeing any results!

Oct. 26, 2010 - diet

8:30am eggs with cheese, oatmeal with blueberries, strawberries, coffee (300 cal)
11:00am tortilla (50 cal)
12:00pm three bean salad, salad with balsamic vinaigrette (450 cal)
1:30pm apple, 2 tbsp pb (280 cal)
3:00pm tortilla, scoop pb (100 cal)
5:00pm eggs with cheese, oatmeal with blueberries, strawberries (300 cal)
9:00pm protein shake with blueberries, strawberries & almond milk (150 cal)
10:00pm apple, English muffin (200 cal)


Total calories: 1,830


Workout:
Back, triceps, biceps, chest

Oct. 25, 2010 - diet

8:30am oatmeal with strawberries and blueberries, eggs with cheese (300 cal)
11:00am 2 tortilla (100 cal) 
12:00pm 3 bean salad, scoop of pb (550 cal)
2:45pm apple, scoop pb (200 cal) 
4:30pm egg white in tortilla, green beans (160 cal) 
5:30pm almonds, latte (200 cal)
9:30pm protein shake (150 cal)
10:15pm english muffin (100 cal)

Total calories: 1,760

Workout:
Abs, shoulders

Oct. 24, 2010 - diet

9:30am oatmeal with strawberries and blueberries, coffee (300 cal)

11:30am almonds (200 cal)

1:30am two english muffins with peanut butter (330 cal)

4:00pm apple (80 cal)

5:30pm eggs w cheese, oatmeal (350 cal)
8:00pm three bean salad (350 cal) 
10:30pm Kashi bar (160 cal)

Total calories: 1,760

Workout:

4 mile walk

Oct. 23, 2010 - diet

Cheat day!

9:00am eggs, oatmeal/grits with blueberries, strawberries (300 cal)

11:30am almonds, latte (200 cal)

3:30pm apple, goldfish (120 cal)

5:30pm 1/2 Auntie Annie's cinnamon sugar pretzel dipped in icing (350 cal)

7:00pm Texas Roadhouse - 2 rolls with cinnamon sugar butter, salad with lo fat ranch, 1/2 slab ribs, fries, 220z. Bud Light, peanuts

9:30pm chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream with whipped cream and m&ms, Twizzlers and orange juice

I figured I totaled about 3,000-3,500 calories for today.  The BF and I went to the outlets, so we walked for about 7 hours, which hopefully negated some of the extra calories.  As long as I negate the calories outside of my maintenance calories (which is about 2,000 calories for me to stay the same), then I don't mind eating this much...and trust me, it's needed after being strict all week! I probably could have done without the Auntie Annie's pretzels and Twizzlers!

Oct. 22, 2010 - diet

Updated half marathon entry with finish line picture! 

8:30am eggs with onions, mushrooms, peppers, coffee, 6 grain blend with strawberries & blueberries (300 cal) 
12:30pm taco salad, tortilla (300 cal) I basically eat the same thing everyday! 
2:15pm apple w peanut butter - I love PB, but due to how calorie dense it is, I know I need to cut back! (250 cal)
4:50pm egg salad on english muffin with mayo (400 cal) 
9:30pm burrito, 10 m&ms, two twizzlers, scoop of PB (oops) (400 cal)

Total calories: 1,650

Workout:

Chest, biceps

Thoughts on today:  I've been really hungry lately and I'm not sure why.  I haven't really been working out as much this week, so it's definitely not due to activity levels.  My weight loss halted a bit probably due to my pig out on Sunday after the race...this could be the reason I'm so hungry too.  I also have been skimping on protein, which I know I need to increase again versus relying on carbs.  I have a cheat meal tomorrow (despite a minor 'cheat' tonight) - looking forward to wine, a nice meal and dessert mm mmm!

Oct. 21, 2010 - diet

8:30am coffee, eggs with mushrooms, broccoli, onions & peppers, 6 grain blend cereal with blueberries & strawberries (300 cal)

10:30am banana, sunflower seed butter (300 cal) - IDK why, but I was starving!
12:15pm taco salad, tortilla - still hungry! What gives? (250 cal)
2:40pm cottage cheese w blueberries (200 cal)
5:00pm oatmeal/grits (I was cold! But missing protein here) with blueberries & strawberries, 1/2 granola bar (500 cal)
9:00pm protein shake with blueberries, strawberries & an apple, wrap w pb (380 cal)

Total calories: 1,930

Workout:
I didn't get to the gym last night, so I crammed a lot of my weight training into tonight.  I focused on abs, back, triceps and legs.  Next up is chest and biceps.  Need to get in some cardio badly!

Thoughts on today:  Pretty good.  Got a sweet new 'do.  And by sweet I mean incredibly short.  Guess that's what happens when you tell the stylist to do as she pleases.  It's a nice change and I like change.  I was also SO hungry all day today and not sure why.  I need to start eating more hard boiled eggs again.

Oct. 20, 2010 - diet

9:00am coffee, eggs with mushrooms, broccoli, onions & peppers, 6 grain blend (whole grain oats, wheat, rye, barley, triticale and flaxseed) with blueberries (300 cal) - the hot cereal blend made me so full...it's a weird consistency, kind of rice-y, but good!
12:00pm taco salad (taco meat with cheese, onions, tomatoes and lettuce), tortilla (300 cal)
2:30pm peanut butter and banana, 1/2 apple (340 cal) 
5:00pm banana (100 cal)
7:00pm fish, asparagus, salad, 1/2 sweet potato, 3 small bites of banana cake mm mm good! (600 cal)

10:00pm scoop of pb (100 cal)

Total calories: 1,740

Workout:
2 mile walk

Thoughts on today:  Not a bad day...I was busy, so I didn't make the best choices and didn't have time to go to the gym. Tomorrow is a new day!

Oct. 19, 2010 - diet

9:15am oatmeal w blueberries/strawberries, egg whites with mushroom, onions, peppers, cheese (300 cal)
12:15pm salad with balsamic vinaigrette, green beans (200 cal) 
2:00pm 1 tbsp peanut butter - this stuff is the best and it has the added benefit of flaxseeds - delicious and crunchy! (100 cal)
5:00pm pasta with broccoli, two eggs (had to get in my protein somehow - need to go grocery shopping tonight!) (650 cal)
8:30pm protein shake with blueberries, almond milk (250 cal)
9:30pm tortilla w turkey meat, cheese, tomatoes, lettuce and sour cream (250 cal)

Total calories: 1,750

Workout: 
Shoulders/abs
I attempted the elliptical but after 4 minutes my knees were like 'aw, hell no, lady', and I got off :)

Thoughts on today:  Good overall.  I'm beginning to despise pasta.  I haven't had it in so long (no reason really) and the last two times I ate it, I was burping all night (gross!).  I think it doesn't agree with me, despite it being Barilla Plus, which has a good amount of protein.  I could literally eat pasta until the cows come home, but for what it takes to fill me up, it's not worth the calories.  I'll be staying away for a while!

Oct. 18, 2010 - diet

9:15am oatmeal w blueberries/strawberries, egg whites with mushroom, onions, peppers, cheese (300 cal)
11:15am tortilla (50 cal)
12:30pm salad with chicken and balsamic vinaigrette (400 cal) 
2:30pm protein shake, apple w pb (300 cal)
4:50pm egg white tortilla wrap, cup of rice (350 cal) 
9:45pm one cup pasta with sauce, oatmeal with blueberries (weird combo, I know, I actually ate the pasta cold out of the pan while I was making tomorrow's lunch...then I wanted something warm and comforting and alas, oatmeal!) (300 cal)

Total calories: 1,700

Thoughts on today: I am SO sore.  It takes me like 5 minutes to get out of my chair at work.  Okay, that's an exaggeration, but it really hurts!  My knees are killing me and they get cramped up once I sit for so long....they almost feel better when I'm standing/walking.  Oh well...the pain will subside in a few days.  I plan on taking about a month off from running...from there, I'll decide whether or not I want to get back into training (outdoors - brr, and the treadmill) or wait until it warms up.

Workout:
NONE!  I am too sore :(

I DID IT!! The Amica Marathon (United Healthcare Half Marathon in Newport)

The start of the full and half marathon (Memorial Dr., Newport, RI).

Nearing the finish!

The Amica Marathon (United Healthcare Half Marathon in Newport)

13.1 in 2:11 (not official) - and I AM DONE!!!  Woohoo!  More to come after I ice my knees and nap! :)

Update: 2:11:44 is official.  Now, that I am rested and don't feel hungover (I guess to due dehydration), I can type my experience.  I awoke at 5:20am and got everything together - my gels, iPod, throwaway gloves and headband, chapstick, sunscreen, etc.  I had a big bowl of oatmeal with blueberries and strawberries and a cup of coffee around 6am.  At 6:35am, I was out the door.


7:00am - I hit dead stopped traffic off of the bridge into Newport.  I waited there for almost 30 min. before I entered the parking lot.  I normally allot a lot of time to getting to the race and end up standing at the starting line for a solid hour - not good for my body temp or my nerves.  And now, this time, I thought I would be late!  By 7:34, I was parked at Newport Grand and waiting in line for shuttle to Easton's Beach, where the starting line would be.  It was COLD (about 40 degrees), so I put on my gloves and bounced around a little to keep my blood flowing. I got on the bus around 7:38 and was soo super nervous because not only is this my first race, but I was going to be late.  We finally pulled up to Easton's Beach at 7:50am...I had a few minutes to spare and I desperately needed to use the restroom.


I go over the port-a-potties - holy line!  I inquire to a group of guys if they're in line - they point to the back (about 30 people behind them) and exclaim they have been waiting for more than 10 minutes.  Now, I'm really nervous...and desperate.  We're in the middle of a beach. It's 40 degrees out.  And there is nowhere to go to the bathroom.  I frantically search for another less crowded restroom or port-a-potty, but they're all at least 30-40 people deep....


I see a construction site, which is very desolate.  And then I see three old parking ticket booths (a little hut with 3 walls).  I immediately run over, ducking (a cop was about 50 ft away!)  and pop a squat into a small trashcan that was inside the hut.  Disgusting, yes, but this is was necessary.  I was half afraid of getting caught and having my ass stuck in the trashcan!  I felt pretty badass for having skipped an entire line of people waiting for a port-a-potty, which gave me a little high.  I had 2 minutes left to spare and I ran over to the starting line.


Promptly at 8, the gun shot sounded and we were off!  One of my slowest miles was actually in beginning because of all the congestion.  It finally thinned out around mile 2 and I was able to keep a nice pace of about 9:20-9:35.  I was feeling good...we went into Fort Adams (mile 4) and I literally closed my eyes, took a deep breath and felt thankful to be alive.

I kept running...thoughts popping in here and there.  I was so afraid my foot would be hurting, but it actually felt great.  And by great, I mean I loaded the puppy up with Aspercreme (think of putting menthol on your foot) and the menthol felt like acid on my foot once I warmed up.  The feeling of my flesh being ripped off (even though it wasn't really), was enough to take away any foot pain I was feeling (and thankfully, I was feeling none!).


Mile 6, 7, and 8, I felt good.  When I was halfway through mile 7, I was surprised how good I had felt.  Just two weekends ago I had run 7.1 miles and was kind of winded by then.  I wasn't breathing heavy at all (even when I finished).  I wasn't fatigued and my muscles felt great.

Then it came: The Wall.  I had hit it and I hit it hard.  Mile 9 was the death of me.  And not because I was tired or had no energy...I actually felt pretty good.  But my knees were THROBBING.  I knew this pain was not going to go away, but no matter if I walked to ran, it as still going to hurt.  


I repeated some sayings in my head "Pain is just weakness leaving the body.", "Pain is temporary, pride is forever.", "Every wall has a door."  Really lame stuff.  But it actually helped.  With the internet results posted, I knew I had to do well because everyone in my family would be checking and it's also on there forever

I trudged through mile 9 and 10 taking periodic breaks to stretch my knees (no longer than 10 secs at a time).  The last three miles felt like they were forever.  I busted out my Gu that I had stored in my bra (Tri-berry, very tasty!) and sucked it down.  I didn't feel like I needed the energy, but I thought that even if it helped psychologically, it would be worth it.

My knees ached and ached.  At mile 11 (nearing 12) I spotted an athlete competing in a wheelchair.  I literally thought to myself, "What am I? An asshole?  So, your knees hurt...get going and quit complaining.  This man would KILL to have his knees hurting."  This provided a little more fire under my ass to trudge through miles 11 and 12.  As I neared mile 13, I knew I was close.  The last stretch was Annendale Ave/Memorial Dr. and as I was nearing the corner, the crowd got louder and more people were standing around.  The last part was pretty downhill, so I was able to pick up some speed.  I passed a few kids that had their hands out and I gave them each a high five - it was adorable.  I zoomed down and started to head into the narrow section before the finish line.  I ran and ran as I heard the crowd cheering.  I looked to my left and saw Scott, my Dad and Karen saying 'Go, Kelly!!' and ringing their cowbells and pom poms.  

I sprinted toward the finish line and pumped my hand in the air.  I was DONE. A volunteer placed a medal over my head and I walked off to the side.  The clock said 2:15, but my watch said 2:12, so I knew I was somewhere closer to 2:11/12 for my net time.

Scott, my Dad and Karen rushed over and gave me hugs and congratulated me.  Aside from my knees, I felt fine.  I wasn't winded or tired, but man, did my knees ache.  

We walked a half mile to the car (UGH!) and went out to breakfast.  I sucked down coffee milk and four glasses of water (including a full water bottle).  I was feeling queasy, but I knew I had to eat.  I should have really noshed on a bagel and banana, but instead I opted for cinnamon french toast and home fries.  It sat like lead in my belly.  I went to the bathroom a few times and I felt seriously hungover.  

On the drive home, I had to stop at a place to use their restroom and after that last stop, I felt much better.  I chugged more water throughout the day and took a little nap (I barely slept the night before!).  Later on, I watched Marmaduke with Scott and chilled on the couch icing my knees with bags of frozen squash!  Aside from the pain, I felt really accomplished.  I can't wait to do it again next year...but this time, I'll train! :)

I ate like a cow yesterday.  Even though I burned 1800 calories (give or take), I should have relaxed a little.  I knew it was my cheat day, but I totally went overboard.  I'm back to eating healthy today...here's a sampling of what I devoured :)

Oatmeal with blueberries/strawberries

Jelly Belly energy beans

Gu gel

Cinnamon French Toast

Home Fries

Coffee milk

Two pieces of Italian Bread with butter leftover form my carbo load the night before

M&Ms

One blueberry muffin

Four pieces of pizza

3 Cinnastix

Chocolate covered apple (1/8)

Oct. 16, 2010 - diet

9:30am coffee, oatmeal with blueberries & strawberries, eggs with mushrooms, onions and peppers (300 cal)
12:00pm 1/2 Luna bar (80 cal)
2:30pm  1/2 grilled chicken wrap, broccoli (400 cal)

3:45pm the other half of my wrap :) (300 cal)

7:00pm CARBO-loading woot! Italian bread and penne with marinara sauce (500 cal)

It is 13 hours before my race and I am SO nervous.  My BF and I drove the race course today and while it certainly is beautiful, it is also VERY long - eek!  Check out the video someone took of the half marathon course here.

Today was super windy, but the wind is supposed to die down by tomorrow morning. I am going to run out to Walmart and get cheap gloves that I can toss once I get warmed up. The race starts at 8am and I plan on being there for around 6:30 am!  My BF remarked, while we were eating lunch, that I had dead hands (my nails get blue/purple when I'm very cold and I have Hashimoto's, which affects my body temperature)!.


Wish me luck - I'll post my results and my thoughts after the race!  Until then, happy carbo loading to me! :)

Oct. 15, 2010 - diet

8:30am eggs with mushrooms, peppers, onions, cheese, oatmeal with strawberries/blueberries, coffee (300 cal)
10:45am apple, pb, tortilla (280 cal) 
1:30pm two tuna on tortilla, salad w balsamic vinaigrette (400 cal)
5:45pm oatmeal w strawberries & blueberries (it's rainy and cold and I was craving warm carbs mmm) (300 cal)
10:00pm carrots w butter, beef patty, pb apple (420 cal)

Total calories: 1,700

Workout: Today is my last workout before the big race.  I did 30 min. on the bike at a low intensity - nothing to tax my muscles, but enough to get a light sweat going.  Eeek!  It's getting so close!

Finally!

Over the course of this week, I went from feeling like I had swallowed a beach ball to noticing my jeans getting looser (which I attributed to their stretch material).  But, I am happy to say I have lost 2.2 lbs!  I knew it would take time and truthfully, I was about to quit last week when I started gaining a big amount of weight in a little amount of time!  But, now, I feel great.

Aside from my clothes fitting a bit better, I'm really noticing that I'm getting more toned.  I've never seen definition this fast and I know it's because I'm eating a ton more protein.  Previously, I've never had a lot of protein in my diet (maybe about 20-30 grams a day!).  Now I'm eating about 100-120 grams a day and not only does it tone me up, but it keeps me very full.  This is a challenge for me because I LOVE carbs.  I just know I have to get more creative with my protein in order for it to appeal with me.

What I've learned so far:

Taste buds change.  I don't 'crave' artificial sweets, like I used to.  I now want an apple before bed (although a lot of natural sugar, it's still better than a bowl of ice cream!).

Cheat days are necessary.  If I didn't have one meal where I could eat a moderate portion of whatever I wanted, I'd surely go insane.  It gives me something to look forward to and it's a nice reward for a job well done.

Exercise is great, but if you eat poorly, you'll feel poorly.  When I was eating processed foods, I was always a little um, backed-up.  Now, I've been visiting the loo more regularly, which is probably from increased natural fiber and additional exercise.

Prepare, prepare, prepare.  This is my biggest challenge, because it's very time consuming to spend a few hours on a Sunday (and Wed/Thurs)  food shopping and preparing meals.  If I have already cut up veggies to throw into my eggs, chances are, I'll use them.  If not, I skimp and I end up making bad choices.

Portion control.  I knew what a portion was, I just lacked the control part.  My idea of a piece of chicken was half the container.  Now, I fill up on veggies and make my protein and complex carbs only about half of my plate (1/4 each).

I'm also happy with my moderate weight loss of 1lb per week.  Sure, if I dipped into 1,200 calories a day, I'd lose weight very fast (including muscle!).  But it wouldn't be sustainable.  This was always my era in the past - I'd starve my body for 1-3 days, then binge, rinse and repeat.  And it NEVER worked.  Now I eat a steady 1,600-1,800 calories, and I have energy for exercising and I'm not a ravenous, miserable person.  My metabolism was also wayy out of whack due to my cycle of eat, not eat, eat a ton, etc. I no longer look at the way I'm eating as being 'on a diet', but rather it's just an overall healthy way to eat - for life.

I will never run in pain again because...

...pain isn't necessary.  I'm not saying quit, not at all.  And I'm not saying that drugs are the cure-all, but after receiving my very first (and totally almost painless...yes, painLESS) cotisone shot, I will never again run through pain.  Although you shouldn't run through pain anyway, and I certainly don't advise masking the pain only to deal with more problems down the road (which is pretty much what cortisone is doing for me), but I also know what it feels like to prepare for something and be thrown for a curve when you get injured.  Do I not participate?  Do I run through the pain?  Will it get worse?  Maybe it'll be better by then.  Do I really feel pain or am I imagining it?

I have three days until my first half-marathon.  I'm VERY nervous, anxious and excited.  But I'm also in a lot of pain - my right foot is always giving me trouble.  This pain is causing me additional anxiety because I'm sure how it will be during mile 2, mile 6 mile 10, or mile 13.09. Would it get worse?  Would I be a 'DNF' (did not finish, for non-runners).  

I read online certain things that can be done for pre-race injuries, which included typical RICE treatment , foam rollers, massage and some voodoo magic (no, really).  Then I spotted the cortisone shot cure.  I read about it...a lot of people advise against it.  I'm usually one who trudges through pain - I have a pretty high threshold.  But with my nerves the way they are, I know I needed relief, albeit temporarily.

I called my podiatirst and was told his office would be closing at noon today because he was leaving on vacation and wouldn't be back until next week.  GAH!  Then the nurse said he would call me back and thankfully, he was able to take me at 11:45.  

I got into the office and patiently waited for my turn.  Around 12:10, I was called into the examination room and sat on the mechanical chair (not electrical, ha!).  The Dr. came in and we chatted about my pain and my race.  And then I saw The Needle.  The Needle is huge.  It's wayyy bigger than any needle I've ever seen in my life.  And it's also very painful (I have been told).  He wiped my foot with antiseptic and sprayed some topical  numbing agent on my skin.  I turned and gripped the seat...we chatted more.  I felt a little pinch in my skin, but I knew this wasn't The Needle going in.  No, no, no - The Needle is much too big to make that little pinch.  He walked over to get a band-aid.  I'm thinking 'oh man, he's already prepping for the bloody aftermath!'.  He unwraps it and places it on my skin.  

"You're done?" I ask.

"Yep, all set."

PAINLESS.  I almost gave him a hug.  We finished with him giving me some great advice (do your own pace, not your brother's, not the girl in pink and certainly not the guy from Kenya!) and off I was - feeling GREAT.

There's a good lesson here: don't listen to others about what is painful, painless, good, bad, etc.  It's all about YOUR experience of things.  The half-marathon might be awful/long/painful by some people's standards, but it might be incredible by mine.  I need to take a deep breath (woosa) and think about MY experience, not what I've been told. 

Oct. 14, 2010 - diet

8:35am oatmeal w strawberries, eggs with mushrooms, cheese, peppers, coffee (320 cal)
12:45pm tuna wrap, salad w balsamic vinaigrette, 1/3 Kashi bar (350 cal) 
2:30pm pb on tortilla (200 cal)
4:45pm remainder of Kashi bar (100 cal)
6:30pm broccoli w marinara sauce & parm cheese, beef patty with veggie cheese (380 cal) 
10:15pm apple w cinnamon, protein shake w blueberries & strawberries (300 cal)

Total calories :1,650

Workout:

1.5 mile walk
bowling

Thoughts on today: Overall good day...I had some slight foot pain from the cotisone shot as the night wore on, but nothing more than the soreness you'd get from a typical vaccine. 

Oct. 13, 2010 - diet

8:45am oatmeal with strawberries, almond milk, coffee w cream (220 cal)
10:00am eggs with onions, broccoli, mushrooms, tortilla (200 cal)  note* I am VERY hungry today!
11:15am tortilla w peanut butter (180 cal)
12:30pm oatmeal w strawberries (170 cal)
2:30pm chicken, broccoli, tortilla, apple w cinnamon (350 cal)

5:45pm two eggs, one egg white tortilla (250 cal)

9:30pm protein shake, broccoli, scoop pb, wrap with veggie cheese (470 cal)

Total calories 1,870 (I was realllly hungry today!)

Workout:
Biceps, shoulders, back, triceps (had to do them all in one day so I can take some rest days).
1.5 mile walk

Thoughts on today:  I feel good...one of my bigger stresses for the week is done - psych exam.  Now if I can only get through Sunday (half marathon!), despite a very sore foot/ankle.  :( 

What gives?

Since I started this intense diet, I've gained a solid pound and haven't seen (or felt) much difference.  This could be because 1) I've only been on it a little over a week 2) my body needs to adjust and/or 3) it's that time of the month.

I decided to submit my question (why am I not losing weight!?) to a forum called AskScooby.  Check out what everyone had to say here.

Quitting cold turkey

"It's my last pack."

"I'll quit tomorrow."

How many times have you heard this coming from yourself or someone you care about?  While I'm certainly to blame, I'd like to think my additiction is a lot less health-harming (but nonetheless an addiction!).  I'm addicted to GUM.  Any kind of gum - Juicy Fruit, Orbit, Trident.  Heck, I'll even sneak some of Grandma's Freedent if I'm really desperate.

But, I've learned that gum - with artificial sugars or not - makes me bloated.  Like REALLY bloated.  And I don't like being bloated.  EVER.

I consume probably around 10 or so pieces a day and I really need to cut back.  

My tactic is to buy slightly more 'expensive' gum, so I chew less of it (I buy Trident in the blister packs now vs. the Sam's Club bulk sized Orbit).  I also buy one at a time, versus the three packs, so ration it out to last a while. I also 'reward' myself after a healthy lunch or snack with a stick of gum versus a stick 'whenever I feel like it'.  So far, I've really cut back.  I'm not ready (or willing) to quit cold turkey, but I am proud to say I've resisted to pop a Trident more often than not.

What are you addicted to?  And how have you curbed it?

Oct. 12, 2010 - diet

8:20am oatmeal with blueberries, eggs with mushrooms, onions, peppers, coffee (300 cal)
11:00am two egg white with orange pepper tortillas (220 cal)

1:10pm salad with grilled chicken & balsamic vinaigrette, 1/2 c Spanish rice (370 cal)
2:45pm 15 almonds (150 cal) 
3:15pm apple w pb (180 cal) 
6:00pm protein shake w blueberries, strawberries, almond milk (150 cal)
7:30pm meatloaf, broccoli, green beans (450 cal)
11:00pm 1/2 apple with cinnamon (40)

Total calories: 1,900

Workout
Chest
20 min. bike

Thoughts on today:
I had a lot of calories today.  I was really hungry at dinner time and after my workout.  Overall, not an awful day, but heavy on the calories.  Hopefully my cardio balanced it out.

It's just one of those days...

 ...that a girl goes through.  Remember that Monica song?  Parts of it (aside from the love aspect) summarizes my past few days.  Okay, so maybe she should have sung 'it's just one of those weeks...'.  Anywho, I'm stressed.  EVERYTHING, and I mean everything, is pissing me off today.  My life is like Office Space to begin with and it certainly doesn't help that I have been getting shocked by every door, filing cabinet, cubicle possible today!  UGH!

I must admit, I am very easily stressed.  I'm an over-thinker, over-analyzer, worry-wart to the max.  I can't help it...1) it's genetic and 2) I like striving for perfection.  The root of my miserable mood is the fact that I have been eating extremely healthy (as you can see) and haven't lost anything!  Everything is the same and in fact, my weight has increased.  I'm hoping this is due to Aunt Flo, but normally, I'm not THIS bloated, miserable, fat and cranky!  To boot, I've also sprouted some serious pimples on my cheeks, something I have never gotten before!  I found it could be due to my Whey protein powder, but I'm hoping my body will just adjust to it and go away.  I also woke up this morning with some XXL, 'more-than-a-carry-on' sized bags under my eyes!  Holy moly, do l feel like a swollen mess.

To put it in perspective, I know today isn't THAT bad...I always say (and perhaps this is not PC and kind of wrong), 'at least I have legs!'  And think about it: how much difficult would life be without functioning legs?  Just a quick activity like running to Target for an errand would be SO much harder.  This thought is even to snap me out of my funk and be grateful for how blessed I truly am. 

What do you think of (or do) to snap you out of a funk?  How do you remind yourself that things aren't really that bad?

Oct. 11, 2010 - diet

8:30am oatmeal with blueberries, eggs with mushrooms, onions, peppers, coffee (320 cal)
11:50am 10 almonds, salad with grilled chicken & balsamic vinaigrette, 1/2 c Spanish rice (400 cal)
2:30pm apple w/ PB (200 cal)
5:00pm meatloaf, green beans, cauliflower, bread (400 cal)
6:30pm protein shake (100 cal)
8:15pm two egg wraps (2 whole eggs, 1 egg white) (250 cal)

Total calories: 1,670

Workout
Legs, abs
1.5 mile walk

Thoughts on today: I am swollen and bloated.  I look like I stuffed a giant beach ball under my shirt.  I'm hoping it's because of Aunt Flo that I've gained three pounds in the past week.  Honestly, sometimes I wish I actually was pregnant because then it would explain why I'm 1) ravenous 2) pimply and 3) looking like a barrel with legs.  I initially set out to do 30 min. on the bike after legs today, but decided to opt out because I did 30 min. on the bike Fri., Sat., and Sun., of this week.  I took my pup for a leisurely 1.5 mile walk and the cool, crisp fall air felt gooood.

Oct. 10, 2010 - diet

8:30am oatmeal with blueberries (200 cal)

11:15am scrambled eggs with onions, peppers, wrap (200 cal)

1:00pm 1 tbsp peanut butter (100 cal)

3:30pm salad with one hard boiled egg, protein shake w blueberries/strawberries (280 cal)
5:40pm turkey meatloaf w picante sauce, cauliflower, green beans (400 cal)
7:30pm  apple w pb, pb and jelly on wrap (400 cal)
9:30pm apple w cinnamon (100 cal)


Total calories: 1,700

Workout

30 min. bike
1.5 mile walk

Thoughts on today: Today was okay...had a lot of things on my mind, but surprisingly made pretty good decisions.  I must have seriously been craving comfort food, because I almost never want meatloaf! LOL

Oct. 9, 2010 - diet

 Cheat day woot!
9:00am oatmeal with blueberries, 3 eggs whites, coffee (300 cal)
11:30am egg salad sandwich on wrap, EVOO mayo (300 cal)
7:00pm 2 glasses red wine, shrimp scampi, salad, strawberry shortcake and carrot cake - YUM!

Workout
30 min. bike


Thoughts on today:
It's funny how even one week of clean eating can greatly affect your taste buds.  I admit, I love sweets...but after a few days of eating clean, I actually craved strawberries and healthy fruits instead of chocolate (I never believed anyone when this said this!).  It also made my cheat day, and eating the foods I was craving, figuratively sweeter because I can't enjoy them ALL the time.  After eating a normal sized portion of the shrimp scampi, I kept gurgling and my stomach was making ALL sorts of noises!  I think it was like, 'WTF is this!?'

Oct. 8, 2010 - diet

8:20am 2 oz ground turkey, 3 egg whites w/ tomatoes and mushrooms, 1/2c oatmeal w strawberries (300 cal)

11:00am 3 egg whites, 2 tortillas, 1/2c red peppers, 5 almonds (220 cal)
1:00pm large apple, 1 tbsp pb, 1/2c rice (300 cal)

         - my boss burped (extremely gross) at his desk after consuming his lunch.  Kind of ruined my appetite.

3:15pm shake, pita (145 cal)
5:00pm flax cereal w blueberries (180 cal)
7:00pm flax cereal w blueberries, pita w pb (400 cal)
9:00pm Seattle's Best green tea latte with nonfat soymilk (delicious!!) (100 cal)
10:00pm apple with cinnamon (100 cal)

Total calories: 1,745

Thoughts on today: Today was overall pretty good.  I should have done out with the cereal and had a lean protein and complex carb like grilled chicken with a sweet potato.  To be honest, I was pressed for time and didn't have the energy (or the food!) to cook a good meal. My bf and I went to Border's and got coffee and walked around outside (so I got in about another mile).  I had Seattle's Best green tea latte and it was amazing.  I just read they are a subsidiary of Starbucks, which explains the price (!), but it was sweet (no sugar) and healthy (hello, antioxidant's!).

Workout:

Triceps, chest,  30 min. cardio

2 mile walk

Stress eating

The next week will really be a testament to my focus on health and fitness.  I have a lot going on - a fabulous friend's engagement party, two exams, finding a tenant to rent my condo, a sick grandparent, closing on my condo (refi), waiting to hear on a home purchase AND a half marathon the following Sunday (Oct. 17).  

Whenever I'm stressed or bored (or working from home), I tend to nibble...on anything and everything.  Apples, cake, cookies, chips, carrots, chicken - my mouth is like a garbage disposal!

How do I plan on coping?  I know I need to get in an early morning workout.  Doing so will put me in a clear frame of mind and also help me focus on the task(s) at hand.  Aside from being centered, I will know that any reckless eating will diminish my intense workout and stall results.  I also plan on using exercise as way to cope with stress - rather than reaching for the fridge, I'll reach for my sneakers, take the dog for a walk or go run errands.  I know that feeding my body, won't feed my soul and that is exactly what I'm looking for when I emotionally eat.

How do YOU cope with stress?

Frustration has a new definition...

How do I define frustration?  Putting in a week's worth of clean eating - stomaching egg whites on end and ground turkey in the morning, and then not only not losing any weight, but gaining half a pound.  I used to literally eat a large bowl of chocolate chip cookie ice cream every night, complete with whipped cream and sprinkles, and I would stay the same!!

I know it's going to take a while, and I am certainly not expecting miracles, but I also didn't expect to gain anything.  I'm about a week away from my period, so I'm hoping it's water weight.  Maybe I'll be REALLY happy when, after my period, I've gone down like 3 lbs!  Until then, I'll be crying in my car (while dreaming of ice cream, but stomaching egg whites...sigh.).

Working lunch

When I was at my last job, a working lunch literally meant I was stuck in a meeting listening to an old, bald, fat 40 year old man drone on and on about tracking PR results while spitting out half of his turkey on ciabatta.  

Flash forward six months and my idea of a working lunch now involves me sitting in my 2x2 cube gnawing on a salad and chicken while listening to the melody of keys being stroked and sighs being let out.  I can't say I'm unhappy with this option, but dining under a fluorescent light with a potion of food smells wafting in from the kitchen down the hall, leaves little to be desired.

What's the cure for lunchtime blues?  I can't say I know precisely, but I usually take this time to surf the web, catch up on gossip, I mean world news and stalk on Facebook - a little 'me' time, if you will.  Now I no longer associate 'lunchtime' with another hour of work, but a pleasant (albeit short-lived) escape from spreadsheets and marketing jargon like 'synergy' and 'on my plate'.

I write this as I gnaw on my salad, like I said before and my haphazardness caused me to spill olive oil drops on my shirt UGH!  The Tide To Go stick literally saves me every day.  Two seconds later and with a touch of the Tide stick, you would never even know I spilled a thing.  Tide isn't even paying me to say this!  That's how much I like their product! :)

As a side note, I can't stand when people hum in the office - especially during MY 'me' time!

Oct. 6, 2010 - diet

Working from home today (specifically my bed), so I got a slower start than usual (the rain means me and Roxy don't get out of bed until at least 9am).

9:20am English muffin w butter and pb (320 cal)
11:40am medium iced coffee with cream from Honey Dew (100 cal) 
1:00pm egg whites w onions, mushrooms, tomatoes and ground turkey meat, 1/2c oatmeal w strawberries (300 cal) 
3:15pm PB on flat bread (300 cal
5:45pm protein shake w 3 strawberries (200 cal) 
8:45pm grilled chicken on salad with balsamic vinaigrette, 2 cups green beans, 1 strawberry (400 cal)



Total Calories: 1,620

Overall thoughts on the day: I took a gourmet dipped apple class tonight and it was SOO hard to resist taste testing not only the apple, but the dark chocolate, milk chocolate, sprinkles, coconut, Oreo cookies, etc.  BUT!  I did great and didn't succumb to all the delicious goodies around me.  I knew if I had some of the candies, I'd feel icky after and would really be down on myself...I thought about my emotions AFTER the eating and that is what prevented me from indulging.  I'm really fighting having that 'something sweet' and this is a big hurdle for me.  Instead of chocolate after dinner, I had one strawberry and it surprisingly satisfied my urge.



Workout
10 minutes interval cardio (I was not feeling cardio today!)
Chest, biceps

Egg whites and chicken

I'm only on day two of my transformation challenge and already I am sick of egg white and chicken.  It doesn't help that I have to peel four stinky eggs in the kitchen and it never fails that someone will walk in to grab a coffee or refill their water bottle.  I don't want to become the farty egg girl at work!

Any ideas on other (tasty) sources of lean protein or how to differently prepare eggs and chicken?  Please share!

Oct. 5, 2010 - diet

Preparation is key when eating on the go

8:15am 2 oz ground turkey, 3 egg whites, 1/2c oatmeal w blueberries, iced green tea (300 cal)

I had to eat this at my desk today because I had a 7:15am podiatrist appt. 

10:20am 4 egg whites, 1/2c red pepper, 2 tortillas (250 cal)

1:25pm salad w chicken, balsamic vinaigrette, 1/2c rice pilaf (350 cal)
4:30pm Gala apple w organic peanut butter, protein scoop (290 cal)

7:00pm salad w chicken, balsamic vinaigrette, broccoli (350cal)

9:30pm protein shake w 5 strawberries (230 cal) 

Total Calories: 1,770

Overall thoughts on the day:  My diet was spot on today.  When I don't have a crazy schedule, I can eat much better.  In order for me to stay on track, I need to prepare in advance - i.e. eggs made ahead of time, chicken cooked day before, etc.  Otherwise I get lazy and resort to unhealthy foods.

Workout
Shoulders

Oct. 4, 2010 - diet

The highlight of my day was my apple with peanut butter.  I<3PB

8:30am 2 oz ground turkey, 3 egg whites w/ tomatoes and mushrooms, 1/2c oatmeal w blueberries, iced green tea (300 cal)

11:00am 4 egg whites, 2 tortillas, 1/2c red peppers (250 cal)

2:20pm 3 oz. deli turkey, salad w 1 oz. balsamic vinaigrette, 1/2c rice pilaf (320 cal)

4:30pm Gala apple, 1 tbsp peanut butter (180 cal)

6:20pm protein shake, 1/2c broccoli (100 cal)
9:20pm protein shake, 1/2c broccoli (100 cal)
10:30pm apple w pb (200 cal)

Total Calories: 1,450

Overall thoughts on the day: Seriously, I am going to be banned from my cubical.  Between the stinky eggs at 11am to my smelly onions on my salad, I am a cube-mates nightmare!  I can't believe how much I am eating on this diet, but it's all really healthy (the carb-protein-fat ratio is spot on) and I am full and feel great.  I don't think I'll be able to tolerate much more eggs, so I'll have to find another lean protein.  Eggs really are the perfect food, so it'll be hard to find something low in fat and calories, but high in protein.  My calories were a little low, but it's hard on Monday nights due to my class being from 6:30 until 9 (not getting home until 10 or so) - I don't want my body taking from my lean muscle!

Oct. 3, 2010 - diet

Oct. 3, 2010:

10:30 am toasted almond iced coffee with cream and agave nectar, English muffin w organic PB (400 cal)

Flax cereal w/ blueberries and banana

1:15 pm flax cereal w milk, banana, blueberries (400 cal)
4:00 pm oatmeal w/ bb, 10 almonds, 2 scoops PB (550 cal)
6:30 pm Arnold flat bread with two slices veggies cheese (190 cal)
8:30 pm mixed greens w balsamic vinegar, spinach w EVOO (150 cal)

Total calories: ~1,700

Workout

Overall thoughts on the day: I feel great today.  I put in a great workout and I ate very healthy.  I bought all my food and assembled my lunches and snacks (and dinner for tomorrow night since I go from work right to class with an hour to spare), up until Wednesday.

Score on today's healthiness: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
I gave today a nine because while everything was pretty spot on, I definitely need to eat more protein.  Protein will keep me full and will help me build muscle.  I should have incorporated chicken in my salad or eggs for breakfast.

Starbucks Iced Green Tea

I had my very first iced green tea from Starbucks today (I had a free drink card I needed to use; you'll never find me there paying full price - ha!).  I know, this is very circa 2008, but I LOVE it.  I'm on a quest to find some Tazo Zen tea so I can recreate my own blend at home using an online recipe I found and tweaking it according to my taste buds.  

I think I'm partially doing this not only for the health/antioxidant benefit, but also because I've always lusted after the plastic fountain style cup with straw at Target.  I could use my old to-go coffee cup, but certain drinks just taste so much better when drunk out of a straw.

Here is the recipe - it taste JUST LIKE Starbucks...but it goes down smoother knowing that you only paid about $3 for a whole week's worth.  Enjoy!

1) Using a whole box of Zen Tazo teabags (the regular, small size), place all the bags of Zen Tazo tea in 1 liter of hot (nearly boiling) water (place the bags in once it starts boiling).

2) Let this steep for 5 minutes.

3) Remove tea bags and fill a pitcher with one liter of cold water. Add the hot tea water to the pitcher; this will bring you to 2 liters of "concentrate".

4) When you want to make a glass of iced tea, add one part "concentrate" to one part water and 2 parts ice OR to your personal taste. (Some people like no additional water.) You can also add a simple sugar syrup (you can buy Starbucks' Classic syrup) to taste as well here.

Oct. 3, 2010 - workout

October 3, 2010

My battle wound and my pace.

8:30 am - I ran 7.1 miles today in 1:08 (mostly uphill too!). Check out the route here.  I am super proud of myself.  It was sooo cold this morning, but I was determined to run (I have a half marathon in TWO weeks that I have done NO training for!).  I really would have liked to stay under my covers snuggling with my dog or indulging in the biggest bowl of hot oatmeal with all the fixings

My iPod was dead (IDK if the battery ran out or it was cold from being in my car), so I had no music...which really helps me dig deep inside sometimes to get that extra energy.  I put it back in the house and went on my merry way.  I started a quick warm-up walk and then started jogging.   As I was approaching the entry way of my condo complex I was one step away from stomping on an orange and black garden snack.  I made some embarrassing noises and continued running.

Despite the cold, I was pretty warm about .75 miles in, so I took off my jacket.  I tied it around my waist, but it really wasn't happening.  I ended up stuffing it in between branches on a short tree and had to retrieve it later!  I actually really like that jacket, lol, so I was glad it was still there!

I ran a surprisingly good 9:35 pace, which I wasn't expecting, especially considering I ran a 10 min. pace last Sunday when I only ran 5.5 miles.  The last 1.5 miles I BOOKED it, which helped me shave off about 5 secs per mile from my pace.  At about mile four, I must have surpassed my lactic threshold and I felt like I could run forever.  My blister was bothering me from my orthodtics, so I took them out at about mile 5 and stuffed them in my sports bra.  Thank God no one could see me close up from the road because I looked awfully er, in-proportionate!

My thighs are really tight, despite stretching, so I am going to try and incorporate yoga into my day/night to help loosen me up.  As I write this, I am devouring a nice and toasty English Muffin w organic PB and a Honey Dew toasted almond iced coffee with cream and agave nectar.

*Update* 9:06pm
I walked around all day feeling amazing; it's funny how a good workout puts you in a whole different frame of mind.  I have more energy and I feel good about myself, which in turn means I make good choices about what I put into my mouth.  I've also noticed that runners have this superiority about them...I walked around today basically thinking, 'geez, I ran 7 miles today, what the hell did you do and WHY are you moving so SLOW!?'  (this was at Trader Joe's and Target today).  I didn't do yoga, but I stretched a bit and I'm hoping to fit in some yoga sometime during the week.

Food Log

My diet has gotten out of control over the past few months.  I've been really eating awfully and I'm not sure why.  I used to be very conscious and motivated and not sure if my eating is due to stress, boredom or something else.  In order to get on the right path and 'undo' my past eating sins, I will be following a new, healthy diet, one that incorporates lots of lean meat, healthy carbs and lots of water (something I always find myself skimping on!).  I tend to always crave a 'something sweet' after dinner, so that will be my biggest challenge.  With a ravenous boyfriend who can eat dishes of ice cream and not gain a pound, as well as the fall and winter months ahead, this will certainly be a challenge.

As part of the Muscle & Fitness Magazine Transformation Challenge, I plan on eating according to their plan and supplementing protein/carbs where necessary.  My menu plan is as follows:

1,650 calories/day

7:30 am - 3 egg whites, 2 oz. ground turkey meat, 1/2 cup oatmeal

10:00 am - 4 egg whites, 1/2 cup red bell pepper, 2 corn tortillas (or some kind of similar quiche)

1:30 pm - 4 oz turkey breast, 4 oz baked potato or 1/2 cup rice, 1 cup broccoli

4:30 pm - 1.5 scoops whey protein, 1 apple, 1 tbsp peanut butter

6:00 pm - 4 oz chicken, 1 cup broccoli, salad w/ 1 tbsp EVOO/balsamic vinegar

8:30 pm - 1 scoop casein protein, 1/2 cup strawberries, 1 tbsp flaxseeds

Estimated daily totals - 180g protein, 142.5g carbs, 41g fat

Rinse & repeat for the WHOLE week!  :)

This diet will seriously help me reduce my intake of processed foods, coffee and soda, which all are not only bad physically, but add no positive calories.

Here, I will be keeping track of how closely I follow the plan, as well as my feelings during the day in regard to food/hunger, etc.

Fitness Plan

I've been slacking.  I used to be addicted to exercise - walking up early each morning to get in a half hour, staying constantly active throughout the day and then doing a little something at night, like strength training or yoga.  For some reason, I've been in a slump.  And I know my lack of energy and dull appearance is a direct effect of not exercising.  I am resolving as of October 2, 2010 to make exercise a priority.  In order to do this, I am aiming for the following (courtesy of Muscle & Fitness Magazine's Transformation Challenge):

Week 1-4

Monday: shoulders, abs

Tuesday: chest, biceps (cardio)

Wednesday: off

Thursday: legs (cardio)

Friday: back triceps

Saturday: off

Sunday: long run

Week 5-8

Monday: back, abs

Tuesday: chest (cardio)

Wednesday: legs

Thursday: off (cardio)

Friday: shoulders, abs

Saturday: biceps, triceps

Sunday: long run

I have a half marathon coming up in two weeks that I have done very leeetle training for, aside from a 5.5 mile run last Sunday which resulted in two day hamstring pain and blisters on my left foot (shoes were too tight from over-pronation correcting orthodotics!). Let's see how this week's run goes (hopefully 11 miles).

The beginning of the journey...

Ralph Waldo Emerson said it best - "What lies behind us and what lies before us are small matters compared to what lies within us. And when we bring what is within us out into the world, miracles happen."

What lies behind us

I've lived a good past, but my past 24 years haven't been perfect. Mind you, my definition of 'success' and 'failure' is very well different from the next person.  What I may view as a failure is a misstep to some people and what I may view as a success could be merely the next step for someone else.  I've done a lot of things I have been proud of (graduating college and graduate school, buying a condo, achieving career success) and lots of things I am not happy about (failure to start my own business, not yet writing a book, lack of good ideas, indecisiveness on future career path, mistreating people down the road).  

What lies before us

I have time, but not a lot.  I'm turning 25 this month and the looming quarter century birthday is enough to scare the wits out of me.  I want a family down the road and I don't want to burden them with my intrinsic questions about life and what I want out of it.  Now is the period between knowing what I want and doing what I want and I have to accomplish whatever that 'want' is starting now.

What lies within us

What is it that I want?  That's the question.  I don't mind hard work, I can handle sacrifice, but what I can't handle is not knowing the end goal and what it is I'm seeking.  This mostly ties to my career, but can be used within all facets of my life - what kind of journey am I seeking (what do I want)?  Will it work with a family?  Will it provide the lifestyle that I want?  Will it provide the self satisfaction that I crave?  What if I embark on this journey and decide this, too, isn't the right path for me?  What if I fail?  I'd like to partly blame my quarter life crisis on this internal self examination, but I've been struggling with this for a while.

I've decided to write this blog to not only put thoughts on paper, but to receive feedback, advice and constructive criticism from my readers.  As a self-therapy, I've decided to throw all my struggles, emotions, thoughts, and success into the websophere as a self-cleansing.  Already, I feel like a weight has lifted off of my shoulders.

I know that what is inside of me is nothing compared to what I've done in the past and what I will do in the future.  I know if I follow what's inside, miracles will happen...I just have to find that 'what's inside'.